


breaking point

by cadyjanis



Series: mean girls [1]
Category: Mean Girls - Richmond/Benjamin/Fey
Genre: Angst, Crushes, Developing Friendships, Drama, F/F, Kissing, Pining, Prom, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-05
Updated: 2018-08-11
Packaged: 2019-06-22 00:16:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 10,940
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15569508
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cadyjanis/pseuds/cadyjanis
Summary: but janis has reached her breaking point, and that anger from earlier comes back hotter than before.she finishes her breakfast then hurries back to her room, falling into bed with her phone. she taps into her messages and scrolls until she finds her last conversation with a certain plastic. the odds of regina agreeing to this are slim, because there’s nothing in it for her. but she doesn’t have a prom date, either.—a jealous janis recruits her least favorite person in a backwards attempt to win over her crush.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> hi mg/bway fandom! i’m new here but i’ve fallen into a cady/janis hole and i cranked this out in 2 days. oops.
> 
> initially was going to be posted as a oneshot but i decided to break it up into chapters. hope y’all enjoy :)

It’s the week before prom, and Janis still doesn’t have a date.

 

Cady doesn’t, either. Which Janis finds odd. Since Cady is, like, one of the cutest girls in school now. How she doesn’t have boys falling all over her is a mystery to Janis. It is less of a mystery as to why Janis has yet to be asked out. She’s a dyke, after all. No boy other than Damian gets too close.

 

“I’ll be your date,” he suggests, semi-jokingly, as they navigate the bustling school hallways.

 

Janis rolls her eyes. “You’ve been my ‘date’ to every school dance since Spring Fling. Get out there and find yourself a real date. You deserve it, bud.”

 

Damian opens his mouth to protest, then realizes she’s right.

 

“Well, so do you,” he argues, elbowing her. “You aren’t the only girl who likes girls in this school. I hope you know that.”

 

Janis bites the inside of her cheek, looking down at her Doc Martens. She’s aware of that, but it doesn’t feel like it. Regina came out last fall, but she’s not into Regina and Regina would probably say the same about her. They’ve been in an awkward limbo for a year, where they aren’t exactly friends but not enemies anymore, either.

 

Janis is sure if she asked Regina as a last resort, Regina would laugh in her face.

 

_Once a Plastic, always a Plastic,_ Janis thinks at that mental picture, but eats her own words when she looks up and spots Cady waving goodbye to a friend. Cady has been nice and normal ever since she made up with everybody, the furthest thing from a Plastic as she can get. Looking at her now, you couldn’t tell she was once a faux Regina, and Janis’s stomach does a funny flip-flop at the sight of her.

 

Cady sees her and Damian and jogs over to them, beaming. It’s like she’s a drop of sunlight personified. It’d make Janis sick if she didn’t find it so cute.

 

“Hey guys,” Cady greets, and Janis offers her hand for a fist-bump, which Cady happily gives. Playing it cool around Cady is becoming a harder feat by the weekday.

 

“You look spectacularly joyful today,” Janis notes, smiling a little. Cady’s euphoria is contagious.

 

Cady bites her lip and inhales dramatically, glancing between Janis and Damian with wide eyes. Then she breathes out and says, “Okay. So. Guess what happened today. After lunch.” Telling by the look on her face, it’s pretty obvious what happened, and Janis tenses up.

 

“What?” Damian presses, eyebrows raised expectantly.

 

Cady squeals, nose scrunched. “I have a date to prom!” she announces, hopping from one foot to the other, pink Converse scuffing the floor.

 

Damian reacts just as theatrically as Cady was hoping for, while Janis’s jaw drops and she tightens her grip on her backpack straps. Her first emotion is numbness, then it’s swiftly transforming into anger—white, hot anger that boils in her belly and rises up into her chest like the breath of a wounded dragon.

 

She rearranges her face before Cady can see, though. She’s gotten good at that.

 

“Awesome,” she tells her as Cady and Damian stop hugging. “Who’s the lucky fella?” She can’t imagine who.

 

Cady presses her lips together to subdue her smile. “Um, Joshua Harden,” she answers, suddenly shy. Josh moved here during spring break after his parents’ divorce, and is finishing school at North Shore. Damian knows him from drama class and Janis sees him around sometimes. He’s not much taller than Cady—who’s a pixie at five four—and could probably gain a few pounds, since his arms are about as skinny as his pencils.

 

But Cady must like him, because she’s practically vibrating from the effort of not doing a jig in the middle of the hallway. That’s what cuts Janis the most—not the fact a boy asked Cady to prom, not even that particular boy. Just the fact she’s so _thrilled_ over it. Janis jealously wonders if Cady would act the same if it’d been her, or just any girl in school. Her anger also stems from her ever-growing hatred of heterosexuals and their cliché, overrated nonsense. Cady being a part of that makes Janis want to vomit.

 

Damian is telling Cady how he thinks Joshua is the perfect date for her, saving Janis, who has disconnected from this conversation, from having to act happy for Cady. He’s a good best friend. Janis, on the other hand, feels like a terrible one.

 

Because she’s ninety-eight percent sure she’s in love with Cady Heron, and she’s close to her breaking point.

 

* * *

 

Janis’s dad has to knock three times before she hears him over the growl of her music.

 

She turns down the volume then opens the door for him. “Yeah?” she says, already unimpressed with whatever he wants from her.

 

Mr. Sarkisian fixes a tight smile—always tight, never natural these days—hands in the pockets of his slacks. “Would you be interested in grabbing dinner with me?” he asks, ever so politely, his eyes pleading. Janis hates that. She hates their relationship is so weird he has to beg her to do stuff with him.

 

“Uh,” she replies, shuffling her feet and avoiding those eyes. “Where do you wanna go?”

 

He shrugs. “Anywhere. Chili’s or something. Oh, or Waffle House. You still like breakfast for dinner, don’t you?”

 

The corner of Janis’s mouth lifts, the teensiest bit. “Yeah, I guess.”

 

“Okay, then.” He nods, turning away from her. “Grab your coat, kiddo. Waffles it is.”

 

Twenty minutes later, they’re seated across from each other at a booth, Janis fussing with sugar packets while her dad tells her about his day at work (after she, reluctantly, shared an edited version of what went on at school). Janis is only half-listening, physically here with him but her mind is miles away—wherever Cady is. Janis bristles at the sudden and intrusive vision of Cady making out with Joshua in his bed.

 

She must be making a disgruntled face, because her dad asks her if she’s alright. She blinks back to reality, shrinking into herself. “Oh, yeah. Sorry,” she mutters, blushing. If only her father knew the crap she had to deal with. The way he talks about his sparkling high school days makes her nauseous.

 

A lot of things are making Janis feel sick today. She wish it would stop; she truly hasn’t had a moment’s peace since Cady’s first day at North Shore.

 

“You look kinda peaky, hon,” her dad notes, looking concerned.

 

She shakes her head, putting the sugar packets away. “I’m fine,” she lies, and is saved—again—from interrogation by a waitress.

 

Janis has difficulty both enjoying her waffles and carrying on a conversation with her father. She can’t do both at the same time, especially not when she wants to be home, in her room, listening to her god-awful music and leaving tear and mascara stains on her pillow.

 

* * *

 

Later that night, when her father is passed out on the sofa, Janis really does get sick. She shuts and locks the bathroom door and doesn’t bother turning the light on since it makes her dizzy anyway. She sits in front of the toilet, clammy forehead on the cool porcelain edge, breathing through her mouth to calm her upset stomach.

 

_Fuck,_ is all she can think, and for a second she wishes Cady was here, taking care of her. But Cady is the whole fucking reason why she’s not feeling well, so Janis pushes down that thought before too much bile can rise in her throat.

 

Janis hates crying, but she winds up curled in a fetal position on the rug and crying anyway. Clutching her midsection, she lets salty tears drip past her nose and tries not to make a sound. The last thing she wants is her dad barging in here, demanding to know what’s wrong.

 

She finally throws up around three in the morning, but it doesn’t make her feel any better. She takes something to repress basically everything after brushing her teeth, then climbs back into bed and buries herself underneath her covers, comforted by the closeness and the warmth. It reminds her of her mother.

 

Her mother, who Janis tries super hard not to think about, or else she’ll be rushing to the bathroom all over again. She wonders, in the fleeting seconds prior to succumbing to sleep, if her mom would be proud of the person she’s become, or appalled.

 

Janis leans more toward appalled. She expects the worst in people, anyway. That wouldn’t surprise her in the slightest.

 

* * *

 

People typically either avoid Janis or they give her a wide berth. This morning it’s clear she’s not in the mood nor is she germ-free, so she’s able to stalk to her locker as the people around her step aside once they take a look at her face.

 

Grouchy and tired from a bad nights’ sleep and still borderline nauseated, Janis takes more time at her locker than usual due to getting confused in her delirium. She simply sighs when she drops her algebra book, but someone swoops in to nab it so she doesn’t have to.

 

Then they stand up and Janis comes face-to-face with Regina.

 

Regina smiles awkwardly, unused to going out of her way to do things for others, and hands Janis’s book back to her. “Hi.”

 

Janis takes it, unsure if whether or not she’s hallucinating this. “Hi,” she echoes slowly.

 

“You look like shit,” Regina comments bluntly, and Janis scowls.

 

She stuffs her book in her bag and slams her locker door shut, then spins on her heels and walks away. Regina makes a frustrated sound despite the fact there is really no other reaction from Janis she should’ve expected. But she follows her regardless, shouting for her to wait up. As if Janis would ever wait on Regina George.

 

“Wait, wait,” Regina puffs, grabbing Janis’s wrist with an uncharacteristic amount of gentleness for Regina. Janis jerks her arm automatically, but Regina squeezes, trying to convince her to let her hold on. “Janis, wait, I’m sorry. I just—are you okay?”

 

Janis glares at Regina, her arm now submissive and limp at her side. “Not really,” she admits, figuring she has nothing left to lose.

 

Regina actually looks compassionate. Like she gives a shit. Like she’s _attempting_ to care, at least.

 

The bell rings just as Regina is going to ask what the matter is, and Janis worms her wrist out of Regina’s grip, then disappears into the crowd.

 

Neither one of them noticed Cady hovering in the corner, watching them with sad, puzzled eyes.

 

* * *

 

Janis sends herself to the nurse’s office after she nearly pukes during gym class.

 

“Who can I call for you, sweetie?” the nurse, Mrs. Batchelder, inquires.

 

“Ugh.” Janis winces. Her dad is working, but Mrs. Batchelder obviously has no plans to let her go back to class. Janis should be grateful, but instead she just feels worse. It doesn’t help that she passed the Plastics on her way to the nurse’s office, but too quickly to see Regina shushing Gretchen and Karen when they snickered.

 

Janis is about to begrudgingly tell Mrs. Batchelder to call her father when none other than Cady barrels into the administration’s office. She makes a beeline for the nurse’s station, and Janis has never wanted to be dead more than she does right now.

 

“Miss Heron,” Mrs. Batchelder greets in surprise. “Are you sick, too?”

 

Cady is out of breath, and still in her gym clothes, brown curls falling out of her scrunchie. “No. I came to see Janis.”

 

Janis puts a hand over her eyes and waves dismissively with the other. “Go away. ’M fine, weirdo.”

 

“You don’t _look_ fine,” Cady protests, and Mrs. Batchelder stops her before she can get too close, and she pouts.

 

“Honey, you should get back to gym,” the nurse coaxes, but Cady is as stubborn as a zebra.

 

“Can I wait with her until her dad comes to pick her up?” she pleads, and Janis rolls her eyes. Cady doesn’t have to play the savior. Janis is fine on her own.

 

Cady must be using the full force of her big blue puppy eyes, because Mrs. Batchelder gives in with a sigh, and Cady goes to sit at Janis’s feet. Janis peeks, seeing Cady’s hand stop before resting on Janis’s ankle, then settling between her knees.

 

The girls are quiet as Mrs. Batchelder rings Mr. Sarkisian. Janis keeps her eyes closed, because looking at Cady won’t do her any favors.

 

Her presence, however, is a different and complicated story. As unfairly annoyed with Cady as Janis is, and as terrifying as these feelings are, knowing Cady came to see if she was okay and then stayed means a lot. She’s her best friend—it’s just what friends do. Janis doesn’t think too much on the urgency in Cady’s voice.

 

Mr. Sarkisian arrives ten minutes after being called and Janis forces herself to sit up to lessen his worry. Cady grabs her arm to assist her, and Janis only minds when Cady leaves her hand on her shoulder. Janis grits her teeth bitterly.

 

“Sorry, Dad,” is the first thing Janis groans when her father walks in. She feels even shittier knowing he had to leave work.

 

“Don’t be sorry, kiddo,” he whispers, not even thinking about that as he feels her forehead for a fever.

 

“Miss Heron,” Mrs. Batchelder says to Cady, “can you please go get Janis’s things for her? Thank you, dear.”

 

Cady hurries out to grab Janis’s stuff, and Mr. Sarkisian takes her seat next to his daughter, who lets him put his arm around her shoulders.

 

“She said she hasn’t been feeling well all day,” Mrs. Batchelder informs him.

 

He nods. “Yeah. You weren’t feeling great yesterday, either,” he says to Janis. “Why didn’t you stay home?”

 

Janis shrugs. Because—well, she doesn’t know. She didn’t think she’d end up here.

 

Her head has unintentionally lolled onto his shoulder when Cady returns, carrying Janis’s backpack and her clothes, which are neatly folded—such a Cady thing to do. She hands them to Janis, whose heart leaps into her throat when their fingers touch.

 

“Thanks, Caddy,” she murmurs, mustering a grin for her friend.

 

Cady smiles, wringing her hands. “No problem. I hope you feel better. Call me if you…need me.”

 

Carrying her backpack on one shoulder, Mr. Sarkisian supports Janis’s waist when they stand, and Janis weakly punches Cady in the arm in farewell. Cady follows them to the doors, then stands on the curb and waves as Janis is buckling her seatbelt. Janis shoots her lazy finger guns, and Cady pretends to take a bullet.

 

Unable to hold it in any longer, Janis breaks down once the car is out of Cady’s sight, and she cries the entire drive home.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you guys SO MUCH for the warm and kind reception on the first chapter! so glad y’all liked it.
> 
>  **okay so here’s some important things to know:**  
>  \- this chapter is more regina/janis but i promise cadnis is endgame!  
> \- i’d only seen the bootleg once when i wrote this and forgot it was implied regina had outed janis. things are different in this story, where regina only bullied/harassed janis for being a lesbian but didn’t out her.  
> \- i’m sure it will seem ooc for what janis does in this chapter (you’ll see), but try to remember she’s coming from a place of pent-up anger, hurt, and frustration and isn’t thinking clearly. again, cadnis will happen and it’ll work out in the end!
> 
> that’s all. enjoy, losers.

Mr. Sarkisian does Janis’s laundry while she sulks on the couch after taking a shower, miserable and puffy-eyed. Their bulldog, Rosie, snores beside her obliviously.

 

Janis is flipping carelessly through the TV channels when her dad comes in and joins her in his recliner. He handled her crying fit pretty well, though it definitely startled him when she began sobbing in the passenger’s seat. Janis, who doesn’t like to show emotion in front of her father, cried next to him for the first time since she was ten—over a woman again, no less. (Even though Cady is barely a wisp of a woman.)

 

But Mr. Sarkisian doesn’t know that’s why his daughter was upset. He thinks she’s just sick and embarrassed about going to the nurse’s office.

 

Janis puts on some old romcom she knows will put him to sleep, then curls up with a pillow, feet against Rosie’s warm belly. She thinks about how Cady was so worried she ducked out of gym to find her. The irony in that, in Cady sitting with her, when Cady doesn’t know it’s indirectly her fault.

 

For being so adorable, and pretty, and kind, and fun to be around. For showing maturity and growth after her Plastics phase. For being an even better friend to Damian and Janis. For just _being_ there. She makes Janis feel less sour towards the world and more open to its silver linings. Janis only feels truly happy when Cady is near, but now it’s like a switch in her brain has been flipped, and she’s resentful towards her instead.

 

Maybe not Cady specifically—just the reality that Janis will never get to kiss her or hold her hand or be her girlfriend. It’s one thing to be in love with your best friend but it is quite another when your best friend is another girl, who is straight, whose date to prom is a nerdy pencil-armed boy.

 

No guy could ever love, want, or need Cady Heron as wholly and purely as Janis Sarkisian does. Even when Cady gets married someday, Janis can say she loved her first. When she’s clapping for the bride and groom, that will come back to her.

 

Janis doesn’t mean to, but she drifts off, exhausted from the past two days. In her dreams, she’s sitting on a beach with her mom and Cady—two women she can’t be with. The first abandoned her and her father. The second is a beautiful girl, her best friend, who has always been destined to belong to someone else.

 

* * *

 

Janis wakes up hours later in her bed without having made the decision to go there, meaning her dad somehow managed to carry her five foot nine, hundred and ten pound figure full of dead weight. She vaguely hopes he didn’t strain his back.

 

It’s getting dark out, and a peek at her alarm clock says it’s quarter to eight PM. Her dad plugged in her phone for her, and she rolls over to tap at the screen since she’s too tired to hold it. She scrolls through her notifications, heart skipping a beat when she sees she has a text from Cady.

 

 

Janis smiles in spite of herself, touched—but not surprised—that Cady reached out to her.

 

 

Janis stretches and rubs her eyes while waiting for a response. Cady could be doing anything. _She’s probably with Joshua,_ a voice in Janis’s head spits scathingly, and she grins without humor. Probably. A little pre-prom date. Where they might kiss.

 

 

 _Oh, I’ve caught a bug, all right,_ Janis thinks, rolling her eyes affectionately. They talk for a while longer, Janis bringing her phone under the covers with her, the cocoon lit up by the glow of her screen. Against her will, Janis falls a little more in love as they chat, for no reason other than she can’t help it when it comes to Cady Heron.

 

* * *

 

Janis is feeling better by the following morning, grateful that it’s Saturday. Prom is happening a week from today, she remembers as she’s pouring her cereal. She makes a grossed out sound, not wanting to throw up anymore. A week from now, Joshua and Cady will be slow-dancing in the gym, Cady wearing a pretty dress with her hair pulled up to make her look like a princess. Joshua doesn’t know how lucky he is to have landed Cady as his prom date.

 

That’s how Janis’s terribly wicked idea pops into her head, and she pauses mid-chew, staring across the kitchen out the window. Oh, it’s awful. It’s downright evil. But Janis has reached her breaking point, and that anger from earlier comes back hotter than before.

 

She finishes her breakfast then hurries back to her room, falling into bed with her phone. She taps into her messages and scrolls until she finds her last conversation with a certain Plastic. The odds of Regina agreeing to this are slim, because there’s nothing in it for her. But she doesn’t have a prom date, either.

 

She types out her message and only briefly hesitates before hitting send.

 

 

She chews her thumbnail and stares at her screen anxiously, pushing down her conscience as it tells her how bad this is. She inhales when the reply bubble appears.

 

 

Janis smirks, shaking her head as she answers. Of course Regina George is always up for a little chaos.

 

 

Karen, bless her, is too dumb to follow the rules and Gretchen would open her big mouth before prom even happened. Regina is, truly, a last resort.

 

 

Janis takes a deep breath, figuring her fate is already sealed, and sends Regina her evil plan.

 

* * *

 

Regina takes Janis out shopping on Sunday, and Janis feels like she woke up in a parallel universe.

 

“We should color coordinate,” Regina says, sliding her sunglasses up as they enter the mall through Nordstrom. Janis coughs when they pass the perfume department, but Regina naturally isn’t fazed. Janis won’t argue with anything Regina suggests, afraid Regina will bow out if they start butting heads again.

 

Janis knows jack shit about fashion or clothes that accentuate her “good parts” or color coordination, so she lets Regina take control. What either of them wear to prom isn’t necessarily Janis’s top priority, but Regina wants to go all out, “so it’ll _hurt_.”

 

Janis chews her lip as she follows Regina through the aisles and aisles of fancy, expensive clothing. She’s completely out of her element. She tries not to let the shame eat her alive as the afternoon wears on, stepping in and out of dressing rooms with Regina to see if her choices match. There’s a lot of pink, but Janis was prepared for that.

 

Ultimately Regina decides on a pale pink floor-length gown that shimmers in any light, held up by spaghetti straps (which gives Janis secondhand anxiety). For Janis, she’s adamant on the women’s suit of a slightly darker but still _coordinating_ color. Janis is cool with that, especially since she gets to wear shorts to prom. They both already have a pair of shoes at home that can go with their attire, and Janis is amazed at Regina’s restraint as they walk by the shoes.

 

“I’m hungry,” Regina announces, grabbing Janis’s elbow before she can head for the doors.

 

“Oh,” Janis says, stepping back into line. “Okay. I’ll pay for lunch.”

 

Regina looks over at her as they ride the escalator. “You’re a fun shopping buddy,” she tells her, and Janis blushes.

 

She lifts a shoulder awkwardly. “Only because I let you do what you wanted.”

 

Regina smiles. “Exactly,” she agrees with a wink that makes Janis feel fluttery and weird on the inside.

 

It’s strange, Janis thinks, to sit in a food court eating Panda Express with Regina, who’s letting herself indulge her cravings now. They have a normal convo like they do this all the damn time. Like they’re _friends_. Maybe they are. Janis isn’t sure. But bonding over creating a little prom anarchy is probably the best way to Regina’s heart.

 

“So,” Regina says, sipping her soda. “You like Heron, huh?”

 

Janis caves into herself, letting her ombré hair curtain her reddening face. “Yeah,” she murmurs, speaking to her orange chicken.

 

Regina is quiet, examining her reaction, then her face softens like it did the other day at school. “Hey. Obviously _I’m_ not gonna judge you for it. I like girls, too.”

 

“Yeah, but you _should_ judge me for liking Cady, of all people,” Janis mutters.

 

Regina shakes her head, blonde curls bouncing. “No. No offense, Jan, but you don’t have many friends. It makes sense why you like Cady. She’s been your best friend since she moved here. She’s pretty much the only girl in your orbit.”

 

Janis’s tongue pokes her cheek. “Basically,” she says reluctantly, stunned by how true that is.

 

“Anyway, I don’t care if you like her,” Regina continues, twirling noodles on her fork. “Like, I’m over what happened. It was a year ago. And Cady apologized, so.” A shrug. “I’m not gonna waste my energy hating people anymore. I used to think it burned calories, but it only gave me stomach ulcers.”

 

Janis nearly spits her drink, and Regina cackles. “For real?” Janis coughs, appreciating the honesty.

 

“Well, one,” Regina corrects, holding up a manicured finger. “One stomach ulcer. But yeah. I used to spend so much time wanting to be the best, I didn’t care who I stepped on, and I thought being nasty would get people to like me. But it’s hard being a bitch when you don’t really mean it. At least for me it was. I don’t want to be that petulant kid anymore. I’ve been trying to be nicer. The point is, I feel better, and I don’t get ulcers from smiling at people.”

 

Janis chuckles, then debates good-naturedly, “But you don’t have a problem with seeing if we can make Cady jealous by pretending to be my prom date.”

 

Regina shrugs again, smirking. “Well. Sometimes the old me takes over.”

 

Janis puts her chin in her hand. “You said you’d be involved if it meant we’d ruin someone’s life. Would the new Regina approve of that?”

 

“See, there’s balance, though,” Regina counters. “We’re getting up to some shady shit, but I agreed to help you because I’m a nice person now, and I expect nothing for my efforts.” She puts her hand over Janis’s, and for once it isn’t a claw. “So it’s a mix of good and bad.”

 

“So what you’re saying is, you’re morally gray,” Janis deadpans.

 

“Mmhm.” Regina nods, scrunching her nose. “Morally gray _and_ pink.”

 

* * *

 

Janis and Regina unintentionally but willingly start hanging out together during the week. Damian gets suspicious on Monday morning when the Plastics strut by and Regina and Janis smile at each other without a hint of tension or sarcasm.

 

“What was _that_?” he demands as Janis opens her locker.

 

“What was what?” Janis says innocently, unprepared.

 

“Regina George _smiled_ at you,” Damian half-yells. “And you smiled _back_ at her! What’d she do, buy you a vibrator or something?”

 

Janis smacks him with her bag, blushing furiously. “Regina isn’t my sugar mommy,” she hisses venomously. “Shut _up_.”

 

“Hey guys,” a tentatively cheery voice greets from behind, and Janis jumps, losing her voice as she turns to acknowledge Cady.

 

“Cady, you won’t _believe_ what just happened,” Damian says dramatically, and Cady raises her eyebrows. “The Plastics just walked by and Regina _smiled at Janis_. And then guess what? Janis _smiled back_. She smiled back! Like they were friends!” He pokes Janis in the arm. “Explain yourself.”

 

Cady looks uncomfortable. Janis wants to punch Damian in the face.

 

“Yeah,” she finally says, holding her hands up in surrender. “Regina and I are cool.”

 

Damian sputters in disbelief. “What do you mean, you’re _‘cool’?_ ” he enunciates, making air quotes. “Since freaking _when_ , Janis? You hate each other.”

 

“No, we don’t,” Janis protests, alarmed by his urgency. “Calm down. All that stuff she did to me, it was years ago. And she apologized for it. Just yesterday she said sorry to my face for calling me a dyke. _All_ the times she’s called me a dyke.”

 

“So?” Damian argues. “That means you’re friends now? You actually forgive her for everything?”

 

Janis stares into his aghast face, standing her ground. “Yeah, Damian. Because that’s my choice to forgive her. I’m not gonna harbor negative feelings towards her if she is actually growing and changing as a person. We had a good talk. She’s different now. And I wouldn’t lie about that. I’m sure if you went up to her and confronted her about it she’d apologize for the things she’s said about you, too. She doesn’t want to hurt people anymore. So, yeah, we kinda are friends. God forbid.”

 

Damian is speechless for the first time in his life. Cady is mute, unsure whose side to take.

 

Janis pokes Damian hard in the chest, sudden tears expecting to spill over. “You can keep hating her all you want, but that doesn’t mean I have to.”

 

And with that, Janis slams her locker shut and storms away, leaving her two best friends shocked and perplexed.

 

Things are awkward between the three of them for the rest of the week. Janis pointedly goes to sit with the Plastics, uncaring if it pisses off Damian. He can eat shit, frankly. Janis has never been so mad at him in her life. Acting like he can dictate who she can forgive, just because he can’t. She understands that, Regina has been nasty to every person in this school at some point, but Janis can make her own decisions. If she wants to move on from it, she’s allowed.

 

Cady, however, is stuck in the middle, not really having done anything wrong. Janis won’t talk to her, either, using this incident as an excuse to fuel her plan. She knows it’s an asshole move to take her frustration with Damian out on Cady, but she wants to make her jealous more than ever. If Cady feels the same about Regina (which would be hypocritical since she was no angel for some time, too), she should be furious when Regina shows up to prom with Janis. Janis doesn’t have any clue how it’s going to help make something spark between her and Cady, but now it’s to anger Damian as well.

 

On Friday, Cady finally apprehends Janis on her way out of school. “Janis, wait!” she calls. “Wait for me. Wait.”

 

“What is it, Caddy?” Janis mumbles, not looking at her.

 

“What did I do?” Cady asks outright. “You’re mad at me and I don’t know why. I’m on your side when it comes to Regina. I mean—I can’t really say who can forgive who. It’d be unfair to agree with Damian when I used to be just like Regina. But I don’t know why you’re ignoring _me_ , Janis.”

 

Janis bites her tongue, gazing out at the parking lot. She really doesn’t know, either.

 

“Have you told Damian that?” she wonders. “Like, did you tell him he was an ass?”

 

Cady nods. “Yes, I did. As an ex-Plastic _and_ your friend, it was my responsibility to call him out. He still doesn’t get it, but he’s sorry.”

 

Janis scoffs. “He’d apologize to _me_ if he was sorry. He’s just being an immature baby.”

 

Cady’s eyes flash. “And you aren’t?” she says suddenly. “Come on, Janis, we’re your friends. You can’t keep ignoring us and rubbing it in Damian’s face like this. He would talk to you if he knew you would listen, but you always do this when you’re upset. You shut down, you push people away. You don’t _want_ to hear that he’s sorry, you wanna be _right_ so you have a reason to keep to yourself. But you can’t _do_ that—”

 

“I do what I want,” Janis shouts, cutting her off. “Both of you need to just back the fuck off, okay? You’re telling me to forgive Damian when I told him I wanted to forgive the Plastics. Neither of you can decide who I’m angry at. If I wanna be Regina’s friend, I will. And if I wanna ignore Damian, I’ll do that, too. I don’t care.”

 

Cady clenches her jaw and steps back, a couple tears falling down her face. Seeing that feels like Janis took a knife and stabbed herself in the stomach. Knowing she did it to Cady, she yelled and made Cady cry. She only feels guilty for that, but not for reiterating her point.

 

“Fine,” Cady sniffs. “Go be friends with the Plastics. You’re right, nobody can decide who you forgive. Just don’t be like me and turn into one of them, because it makes you feel better about yourself and how you treat your closest friends.”

 

Janis’s hands curl into shaking fists and she watches Cady’s retreating back, left alone on the sidewalk. That isn’t why she’s making up with Regina, to become a Plastic. It makes her gag, imagining being one of them, even if all three have matured by now. It isn’t Janis’s fault Damian can’t handle her newfound friendship with Regina.

 

Everything feels so wrong and out of place, like the world is ending. Tomorrow night might be the final nail in everyone’s coffin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> when the teen angst bullshit hits u out of nowhere and u become friends w regina george
> 
> note, because i’m afraid ppl will hate me: like i said, janis is acting from a place of frustration and hurt and isn’t handling this the way she should. as for her and regina, i’m new to the fandom and wrote this in 2 days and was just having fun with it, experimenting with the possibility of them being friends. i don’t ship them in canon. this is just my interpretation of their relationship/regina’s behavior (which she will further explain and apologize for in the next chapter).


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> now the drama really begins... eeek.

Janis arrives at Regina’s house—or mansion, really—quarter to five the next day. She feels small and insignificant upon entering.

 

Her suit has been in Regina’s possession for a week, and apparently Regina took the liberty of having it dry-cleaned, because it smells nice and is even glossier than Janis remembered. She runs her fingers over the silky fabric with a shy smile, nervous to put it on.

 

“You excited?” Regina asks, wrapping a lock of hair around her curling iron.

 

Janis takes a deep breath. “I guess,” she admits. Her stomach is in knots. “Are you?”

 

Regina smiles wickedly. “I’m always up for a party, Janis.”

 

Janis showered prior to coming over, but her hair is still damp, so Regina lets her borrow her hairdryer. It’s weird being in Regina’s room but it’s even weirder knowing she’s not about to get murdered in this sparkling bathroom. Regina puts on music they both like, and Janis is glad they have something else in common.

 

Regina does Janis’s hair first, sweeping back the front pieces to twist them into a bun, then uses her curling iron to make the rest fall in waves around Janis’s shoulders.

 

“I’ve always loved your hair,” Regina sighs, spritzing setting spray to keep it perfect. “I might go ombré this summer. I was thinking my natural color with blue.”

 

“Hm. That’d be pretty,” Janis tells her, and means it. “It’d bring out your eyes.”

 

Regina makes a pleased sound. “That’s what I was thinking, too.”

 

They smile at each other in Regina’s vanity mirror, and it feels nice.

 

Regina keeps Janis’s makeup light, but dusts eyeshadow on her lids so it’ll match their outfits. Janis feels pretty, and savors it. It gets better when she finally dons her suit—she wore something like this for Spring Fling, but this is more mature and she’s grown into her figure a bit. She likes how it looks and feels, and Regina seems happy.

 

As for Regina, she looks drop-dead gorgeous as usual. Her dress clings to her legs and hips, her wavy curls just as shiny. Janis chokes a little.

 

They mess around before they leave, taking pictures of each other and then posing together for Regina’s mom on the front porch. Janis steps down to help Regina walk off the steps, and Regina doesn’t release her hand until they reach her car. Whatever that means.

 

Ms. George drives Regina while Janis follows in her truck. The sky is purpling when they arrive at North Shore, where others are showing up. Regina kisses her mother and takes Janis’s hand again when offered to her. They both wave to Ms. George before she drives off, then stand there looking at their school nervously.

 

“You’re scared,” Janis states. Her own heart is pounding.

 

“Yeah,” Regina whispers, then huffs a laugh. “I just realized,” and she looks at Janis fondly, “this is the first time I’m going out with a girl.”

 

Janis mouth goes dry, but she grins. “Me, too,” she murmurs, squeezing Regina’s hand.

 

They walk into school side by side, immediately earning wide-eyed stares and slack jaws and gasps. Janis wasn’t ready for having to fool everybody else, too. Just her two best friends. She feels dizzy when she wonders, realistically, how they’ll react.

 

“Regina!” Gretchen’s squeaky voice shouts over the crowd, and the girls turn to see her standing with Karen by the gymnasium doors. Janis lets Regina tug her over to see them, arching an eyebrow when she notices they’re both holding hands and color coordinating, too.

 

“You look like a queen,” Karen breathes, admiring Regina up and down.

 

“Thank you, you guys look nice, too,” Regina says, and Janis hastily nods her agreement. “Where’s your dates?”

 

Gretchen and Karen glance at each other, and Karen starts giggling, hiding her face in Gretchen’s shoulder. “Oh, well,” Gretchen says, blushing, “we’re each other’s dates. We were gonna tell you, but…we wanted it to be a surprise. Sorry we lied about who we were going with.” She pulls a guilty face.

 

But Regina is beaming, and Janis can’t believe the odds. All three Plastics ending up being gay? After calling her a dyke since middle school? Incredible.

 

The four of them walk into the gym together, greeted by the thumping beat of music, balloons, and strobe lights.

 

“I thought strobe lights were against school policy,” Karen says. “You know, for people who have seizures.”

 

“That’s the smartest thing I’ve ever heard her say,” Janis murmurs to Regina, who snorts.

 

Gretchen pulls Karen out to dance, leaving Janis and Regina to their own devices. Janis stands on her tiptoes, looking for some sign of Cady. “I swear, if she isn’t here, this will all have been for nothing,” she mutters, unaware she said it out loud.

 

Regina flinches. “We can still have a good time,” she protests softly, and Janis could punch herself.

 

“Well, sure,” she says, nodding, but Regina’s eyes narrow.

 

“I know we aren’t really each other’s date, but can you at least try to pretend to be into me?” she demands, hurt.

 

“Regina, you know I like someone else. You agreed to this.”

 

Regina shrugs, looking away. “I know. But that doesn’t mean we can’t test this out. See how it goes.”

 

“Test what out?” Janis questions, dread curling in her stomach at where this is going.

 

Regina looks majorly uncomfortable, and like she regrets saying anything. Janis can’t handle the thought of Regina having a crush on her all these years; it’d only make the bullying she suffered at Regina’s flawless hands even worse. You don’t bully somebody you like. Internalized homophobia or not, you don’t treat anyone like shit.

 

 _Like you’re treating Cady and Damian,_ Janis’s conscience pipes up. But that’s different. Janis knows she likes Cady, the sole reason she brought Regina to prom was to try to make Cady jealous on the chance she isn’t straight. Damian seeing them and getting pissed will just be a bonus.

 

The circumstances aren’t the same. Janis hasn’t bullied anybody. She’s mad, and frustrated, and pining after a girl who certainly deserves better than her.

 

“Let’s just get a drink, come on,” Regina sighs, and pulls a dazed Janis towards the refreshments.

 

* * *

 

Cady and Joshua show up thirty minutes later, and Janis has to spit her punch back into her cup so she won’t choke on it.

 

Cady is wearing a knee-length royal blue dress with a silver sash around the middle, her hair pinned up in a twist. She’s arm-in-arm with Joshua, Damian on her right. He is alone, but going without dates has never particularly bothered Damian.

 

“Damn, Heron,” Regina mutters, staring at her appreciatively. Janis straightens her shoulders, feeling possessive.

 

She makes Regina put her drink down then drags her out to the dance floor, mixing in with the crowd so they have time to look natural. Regina puts her arms around Janis’s neck—Janis has the advantage of being the taller one by three inches—and Janis’s hands find Regina’s waist. Thankfully a slow song is already playing, because it’s easier to stand and sway than embarrass themselves by acting like they can really dance. (Regina probably can, but that’s beside the point.)

 

“For the record, I like spending time with you,” Regina is saying, and Janis snaps her head back to pay attention, previously distracted by Cady’s whereabouts.

 

“You do?” Janis replies dumbly, unsure what to say to that.

 

“Yeah. You’re fun, Sarkisian.” Regina grins and tugs affectionately on a lock of Janis’s hair. “Thanks for giving me a chance.”

 

Janis shrugs awkwardly. “You’re welcome. Thanks for…making it up to me.”

 

Regina nods. “Yeah. I’ll keep…doing better. I think about how I used to act all the time, and I hate it.” She wrinkles her nose. “I mean, a lot of it, when it came to you…it had to do with my sexuality and stuff. That doesn’t excuse it, because I wouldn’t want to be treated like that now, but I had so much hate for myself inside me. And you were so, y’know, out there. You didn’t care. You knew you were gay when you were twelve, and I did too, but I was scared.”

 

“I was scared, too,” Janis adds quietly. “But I didn’t want my fear of being gay stop me from knowing who I really was. That sounds corny, but…”

 

“That’s where we’re different,” Regina says. “You were scared, but you did it anyway. I was scared, and I lashed out at you because I didn’t know how to handle it. My mom isn’t homophobic or anything, but my dad was. It was almost a relief when he died.” She cuts herself off, staring at Janis’s neck. “No, I shouldn’t say that.”

 

“It’s okay,” Janis soothes as Regina looks down at their feet. “Hey. We all go through it differently. Each lesbian has their own experience. And it’s…not wrong to be relieved about _that_. Regardless of if you loved him anyway,” Regina quickly shakes her head, “okay, no, nevermind. But still, it isn’t wrong to be glad that he’s gone and can’t belittle you for who you are anymore. But coupled with what society tells us, hearing nasty shit from someone who’s supposed to love you unconditionally doesn’t help. And later, it manifests itself inside you, and it takes a while to come to terms with yourself.”

 

Regina nods. “Yes. Exactly. And because of that, I took it out on you, and I’m sorry.” She bites her lip. “I don’t know what I thought I was accomplishing by dishing out what I was getting at home. I’d say it was a fail, but…I hurt you. A lot.”

 

“I forgive you,” Janis murmurs, and Regina hugs her. That’s the first time she said it out loud, and to Regina.

 

Over the heads of people, Janis spots Cady and Joshua dancing and smiling. The music changes to an upbeat song, and couples break apart to dance energetically. Janis nudges Regina, who pulls back to look at her questioningly. She follows her eyes, smirking a bit when she sees Cady.

 

At that moment, Cady sees them, too, as Joshua is spinning her around. Cady falls off-balance and into Joshua, who doesn’t suspect anything. She makes eye contact with Janis, and the expression on her face is one that Janis knows all too well: the look of a girl who’s seeing the person she loves be with someone else. Janis knows, just from having _felt_ that expression, that that’s what it looks like. And it’s the saddest thing in the world.

 

Janis doesn’t have time to tell Regina maybe this was a mistake. Regina is cupping the back of her neck and whispering, “Follow my lead,” turning her away from Cady and Joshua enough that they can’t see Regina’s trick: she presses her mouth close to Janis’s, mostly on her cheek, but from this angle it looks authentic.

 

Janis can’t breathe, and it has nothing to do with Regina’s perfume.

 

Regina makes it seem like a good, long kiss before pulling back, gazing at Janis like she’s in love with her, laying it on real thick.

 

Janis feels just as lightheaded as she’s sure she would feel if they’d actually kissed. “Regina,” is all she can whisper.

 

“You’re welcome, Sarkisian,” Regina chirps, oblivious, then goes to get another drink.

 

Behind Janis, she hears Joshua calling Cady’s name, and she whirls on her heel in time to see Cady pushing open the gymnasium doors and running out. In her peripheral there’s Damian, gaping at Janis, but he matters less than Cady right now.

 

Janis pushes through the shuffling crowd and takes off after Cady. She bypasses Joshua, who looks like a deer caught in the headlights.

 

“Cady!” Janis shouts, panicking as she wonders where Cady could have possibly gone. The girls’ bathroom seems like the obvious choice, so Janis goes to find the nearest one. Cold panic races through her veins even as she locates the restroom and barrels inside, her whole body trembling.

 

She hears sniffling and muffled crying instantly, and she hurries to the stall at the end. “Caddy?”

 

“Go away, Janis,” Cady sobs, and the pain in her voice roots Janis to the floor.

 

“It’s not what you think,” Janis insists, head spinning. She should’ve had a plan for _this_. She was so caught up in the _idea_ of this happening that she didn’t stop to realize the consequences for her actions. She didn’t actually expect Cady to get upset, but she should’ve been prepared.

 

“You and R-Regina come to prom together,” Cady heaves, “a-and she _kisses_ you, in front of everybody. How is that _not_ what I think it is?”

 

“Because she didn’t kiss me,” Janis says. “She didn’t. She only made you think she did. She kissed my cheek, Caddy, there’s probably a lipstick stain there to prove it. And yeah, we—we did come to prom together. Because I asked her to, but not ’cause I like her or anything. Not like that. I just—can you let me explain, please?”

 

“Go ahead,” Cady urges sourly, hiccupping on a sob.

 

“No, like, face-to-face,” Janis asserts. “I can’t apologize to a closed door.”

 

Cady tears off a piece of toilet paper, apparently to dab her eyes with, and unlocks the stall a moment later. Janis steps back, wringing her hands. Cady leans up against the wall, looking at her with red-rimmed, doleful eyes. Janis’s heart downright aches.

 

“Okay, um,” Janis begins hoarsely. “First of all, I…I didn’t think this would happen. I really didn’t. I asked Regina to be my prom date so I could see how you’d react. It was a stupid plan in hindsight because…I don’t really know what I was trying to accomplish, good or bad. I don’t even know what constitutes good or bad in this situation. I was so mad that you were going to prom with a guy—no, not with a guy. I don’t care about Joshua. I was mad that you weren’t going with me.”

 

Cady tilts her head like a confused puppy. “What?” she whispers.

 

“Yeah.” Janis nods, hesitating before she continues, “Because I—I like you, Caddy. I have for…a while. And recently it’s just been killing me. Once you told me and Damian Joshua asked you out, I’ve just been…spiraling. That’s why I got sick. I was so upset that I don’t have a chance with you, and I…I lashed out.” Something clicks in her brain then, something painfully obvious. It’s what she and Regina were talking about—taking your anger and frustration out on other people because you don’t know how to _deal_. Janis couldn’t accept Cady is straight, so she roped Regina into a plan that was never going to work.

 

Janis is positive Cady didn’t run off crying because she’s lovesick, too. She probably was just so shocked to see _that_ , she didn’t know how to process it, either.

 

 _But would that bring her to tears?_ that voice questions. _Would that upset her enough she’d ditch her date and run away to be alone?_

 

“So,” Janis murmurs, “yeah. Regina and I aren’t faking being friends, but it was her idea to pretend to kiss. But it was my idea to go to prom together.”

 

There’s a heavy silence that hangs between them, then Cady smiles ruefully and says, “I don’t know what sucks more. The fact you came up with a dumb plan to make me jealous, or how you just assume that I’m straight and couldn’t possibly like you back.”

 

Janis feels like she’s floating outside herself. It takes her a minute to grasp that last part, and even as she’s grasping it, it’s already slipping through her fingers. Cady steps forward and dabs at Janis’s paled cheek with her makeshift tissue, and it comes away with smudges of pink.

 

“You were right,” she says hollowly, crumbling it up. “She did leave a mark.”

 

Cady brushes past her, throws it out, then exits the bathroom. The door screeches shut loudly behind her, and Janis is left alone. Definitely _not_ what she wanted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> gretchen and karen: gay rights!


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it’s the end :( but the drama will be over and cadnis will get their chance like i promised!

Janis gives Cady some time to herself, needing to figure out where to go from here, anyway. Regina comes looking for her ten minutes later and finds her pacing the hall in a sort of daze. “Janis?” Regina says delicately. “What’s going on? Where’s Cady?”

 

“Don’t know,” Janis admits, still feeling strange. “She—she left. I explained what—what was happening, and…yeah. I dunno where she went.”

 

Regina grabs her elbow, steadying her. She goes to say something, then shuts her mouth and embraces Janis instead. Janis melts into the hug, resting her chin on Regina’s shoulder. Regina smells sweet, and her skin is soft. Janis used to think Regina smelled too strongly of hairspray and was hard as diamonds.

 

When they pull apart, Regina swipes her thumbs under Janis’s eyes and attempts to fix her makeup. “Come on, girl. Don’t cry. Go out there and find Cady.”

 

“And do what?” Janis mumbles, feeling lost and hopeless.

 

“Just talk,” Regina suggests. “Really _talk_ to her. Tell her how you feel. And if she’s hurt—let her do the same.”

 

Janis peers at Regina’s earnest, beautiful face for a moment. Then she exhales and says, “Okay. Thanks. Be prepared for her to be mad at you, too.”

 

Regina scoffs. “Please. I’m used to people being mad at me. But I’ll take responsibility, too. Now go.”

 

And so Janis walks off, unsure where exactly to look for Cady once again. She’s on her way back to the gym, figuring Cady might’ve returned to Joshua for comfort, but she spots a figure on the outside steps when she passes the school’s front doors. _Cady._

 

Janis exits the building, closing the door loud enough Cady knows someone’s there. Janis sinks onto the step next to her, hunching over her knees self-consciously.

 

They’re quiet for a while, waves of hurt and anger radiating off of Cady. Ultimately she’s the one who speaks first. “Why’d you think this was a good idea?”

 

Janis winces, shrugging. “I don’t know. I _wasn’t_ thinking. I…told myself it was genius, but it’s just shitty. And super arrogant. I don’t know why I thought you’d care enough to be jealous over me and Regina. Whether or not you’re…straight…it still wouldn’t have mattered. I guess I was projecting.”

 

Cady looks over at her. “You feel jealous when you thought about me and Joshua.” It isn’t a question.

 

Janis nods slowly, swallowing thickly. “Yeah. I just assumed you’d have the same reaction I do whenever I think about you two. And he’s not even your boyfriend. Just your prom date. So I don’t know why I got so bunged up over it. It’s lame.”

 

“Not lame,” Cady murmurs. “Understandable. But not lame. You just shouldn’t have acted on it.”

 

“I know.” Janis pulls her hair over one shoulder, forming a curtain between them so Cady can’t see her mortified expression. “The whole thing was gross. I know better. _God,_ I fucking know better.” She grits her teeth. “I was so blinded by my own emotions I didn’t think of how this might end.”

 

Cady doesn’t say anything. It’s quiet again, until she asks softly, “Are you really in love with me?”

 

Janis closes her eyes. “Yes. I really am. And I know—I know this isn’t something a person in love would do. This was selfish and stupid. I wasn’t even thinking of you, I was thinking of myself. It was spiteful to want you to feel the way I do whenever you talk about boys. It just wasn’t fair of me, and I’m—I’m sorry.” Her voice catches.

 

“Thank you.” Cady’s tone is stony, but not ungrateful to have received an apology. “And for the record, I’d love to talk about girls, too. But I haven’t mustered the courage to mention that I like them yet.” She breathes in shakily, looking at the mood ring on her finger. Janis is silent, listening with a pounding heart. “But yeah. I like girls, too. I think more than I like boys. Maybe I don’t like boys at all, I’m not sure. I go back and forth. But…girls are rad.” She grins sadly, glancing sideways at Janis. “You made me realize that. I started questioning everything the summer after all the drama. Remember when Damian invited us over to swim? I just about died when you showed up in your swim suit. You had so much confidence around us, you weren’t afraid. And you looked amazing.”

 

It's too dark now to see, but Cady is blushing, and Janis is on the verge of tears. “And, um…yeah. Later that night I just laid awake thinking about you. Your legs, your back, your stomach. How happy you looked to be hanging out with us. With me. But I felt so creepy about it, even though I knew you liked girls. It felt wrong to think about my best friend like that. But we spent so much time together that summer, and my crush—it just sorta happened. I was absolutely terrified, Janis. I’d never felt that way about girls or ever looked at a girl like that before. I started being attracted to others, too. It scared the crap out of me, I didn’t know how to deal with it. But instead of telling you or asking for help, I focused on boys. That’s why I talk about them so much. I guess I still haven’t…accepted the part of me that really likes girls. It’s still scary. But it gets less scary if I’m with you, or I hear you gush over a female celebrity. I feel safe and petrified at the same time. Validated, but freaked out.”

 

She lets that settle, and Janis focuses on her breathing so she won’t pass out.

 

“But if you had asked me to prom, I would’ve said yes,” Cady whispers. “I would’ve said yes a thousand times.”

 

Janis drops her face into her hands, overwhelmed. “Oh, God. Oh, God, Cady.”

 

Cady scoots closer til their knees and arms are touching. The tension has dissolved, replaced by a tangible longing and melancholy that stabs Janis right in the heart. Cady listens to her cry, tears slipping down her cheeks, too. That confession was a long time coming.

 

“I’m sorry,” Janis whimpers, finally emerging from her hands. “I don’t know what else to say, Caddy. I’m so sorry.”

 

Cady leans her cheek on Janis’s arm, looping hers through her elbow. “You’ve said all you needed to say,” she soothes quietly.

 

Janis’s chest aches. She’s uncertain if she’s allowed to be happy Cady likes her when she’s royally screwed everything up. As if Cady would want to be with her now. Janis feels like the worst, most selfish, _Plastic_ person on earth. It’s sickening.

 

“Your plan worked, I guess,” Cady murmurs. “You didn’t make me jealous, but I do like you, and seeing you with Regina… It just caught me off-guard. I don’t think anybody was expecting it. But I didn’t run off because I was envious of her. I ran off because I thought I’d missed my shot at…telling you how I felt. You could’ve shown up with a girl I didn’t know. I still would’ve reacted the same way.” She squeezes Janis’s arm. “So, I’m a little bit in love with you, too.”

 

“But you wouldn’t do this to me,” Janis mumbles, swiping at her streaming eyes.

 

“Except I have,” Cady says guiltily, and Janis looks down at her.

 

“Don’t. Don’t bring that up. That was a year ago,” Janis chastises. “This is now. Even Plastic Cady wouldn’t do something like this.”

 

Cady shrugs. “Dunno. I think she would.” She reaches up with her other hand to push back a strand of hair that had come loose from Janis’s bun. “But, um, I appreciate the apology. And, also, I’m sorry about our fight last week. I shouldn’t have yelled at you.”

 

Janis shakes her head. “No. You were right about everything you said. I should’ve just talked to Damian about it. But I didn’t, because I wanted a reason to get back at him. I am _not_ good at handling my negative emotions, in case you haven’t noticed,” she laughs, cracking a weary smile.

 

Cady grins. “Maybe not. But we’re your friends. We can help you with stuff, y’know. And Damian—he’s over it. He misses you. He told me on the way over here he would try to talk to Regina if it meant you’d stop ignoring him.” She pauses contemplatively. “I think everyone has been in the wrong lately. We’ve all made mistakes.”

 

“I’m the worst contender,” Janis huffs, rubbing her temples to ward off a headache.

 

“Hey.” Cady pulls her hand away and grabs her shoulders, turning her towards Cady. “Listen. I don’t wanna fight anymore, or hold a grudge. Yes, this was shitty and twisted and it upset me. But you acknowledged that and you apologized. I can’t stay mad when I used to do crappy things myself.”

 

Janis nods, wanting to just go home and take a shower and sleep for ten thousand years.

 

“Also…” Cady’s eyes flick to Janis’s lips, and Janis’s heart nearly stops. “Prom night is supposed to be, like, the best night of the year. I want to spend it with you.”

 

Janis’s brow furrows. “But you already have a date,” she reminds her.

 

“He’s not the one I wanted, though,” Cady says, then cups Janis’s cheek in her hand and presses her lips to Janis’s. It’s delicate and light, barely a kiss at all, but Janis feels like a cartoon character with hearts shooting out of her ears and popping from her eyes. Cady pulls back slightly to gauge her reaction, and Janis doesn’t hesitate to initiate a second kiss, having waited far too long for this moment to waste any more time.

 

Cady tastes like fruit punch and sugar and love and stars, and kissing her is even better than Janis imagined it would be. It starts off tentatively, both of them inexperienced and shy, but they figure it out together and Cady ends up in Janis’s lap, straddling her hips like the fantasy materialized out of Janis’s head.

 

Cady is borderline grinding on Janis’s thighs when they break for air, Cady’s hands on Janis’s face, Janis’s on Cady’s waist. Janis feels warm and electric.

 

She peers up at Cady, panting. “Hi,” she whispers hoarsely.

 

“Hi,” Cady whispers back, then smirks. “You can grab my ass, you know.”

 

Janis nips Cady’s swollen bottom lip, sliding her hands down to do just that. “I can, huh?” Cady giggles timidly.

 

“You’re a good kisser,” she says, and kisses Janis softly. Janis hums against her mouth.

 

“Thanks, Caddy. So are you.” She squeezes Cady’s ass, and it feels _so good_ to be able to do that in real life.

 

“Um.” Cady sits, and Janis scoots back so they don’t tip over. “Maybe we should…go back inside,” Cady suggests, removing bobby pins from her hair to let the twist down. Her brown curls tumble to her shoulders, and Janis twirls one around her finger.

 

“Or we can go to my truck,” she murmurs. “There’s enough room in the cab to lie down. You can be on top.”

 

Cady bursts out laughing, startled. “Oh, sure. Like I want our first time to be in your truck. No offense, Janis, but that seems a little cramped.”

 

Janis arches an eyebrow at Cady’s thought process. “I didn’t say we’d fuck.”

 

Cady’s face falls, looking embarrassed. “Oh,” she replies.

 

“But I like how you think, Caddy.” Janis taps her on the nose.

 

They decide to return to the party, since both of them have some explaining to do. Janis opens the door for Cady, and Cady takes her hand when they walk in. Janis’s heart skips several beats. Cady obviously isn’t out; Janis doesn’t want her to feel pressured into telling everyone.

 

“Hey,” she says gently, stopping, and Cady looks at her curiously. “You know you don’t have to tell people you like girls. Not right now, if you aren’t ready.”

 

Cady smiles and shrugs. “I don’t think it’ll be that bad,” she admits, scrunching her nose, and keeps walking, dragging Janis along with her.

 

They reenter the gymnasium, where the lights are bouncing and people are more hyped up than they were before. Cady presses close to Janis’s side, scanning the room in search of their friends. Janis spots Damian sulking on the bleachers, Joshua next to him.

 

Janis points them out, and Cady bites her lip nervously. “Wish me luck,” she says, and Janis squeezes her hand before letting go. Cady approaches the bleachers, and the boys look at her expectantly. Janis sighs and walks off to find Regina.

 

The Plastics are sitting together along the back wall, and Janis waves awkwardly as she approaches. Regina hops up from her chair.

 

“Hi,” she says. “How’d it go? You look like you were crying.” She squints at Janis’s face, then gasps. “Oh! And kissing,” she adds in a suggestive whisper.

 

Janis rolls her eyes, but rubs her thumb along her lips, puffy from _all that_. “Heh. Yeah,” she confesses, and Regina’s eyes get wider. “Um. We talked it out. I apologized. It’s all good now. I mean, more than good, I guess…” She glances over at the bleachers, eyes automatically drawn to Cady.

 

Regina pokes her arm playfully. “You got the girl, huh?” Janis has never seen Regina look happy for anyone, least of all her. But she knows she means it, so she gives her a hug. Regina is surprised at first, but returns it eventually, and again Janis trusts she isn’t holding a metaphorical knife to stab her in the back with.

 

Damian comes over while Cady is talking to Joshua in private. He looks at Janis, then at Regina. Janis crosses her arms, standing firmly next to Regina.

 

“Cady said we should talk,” Damian says to Janis stiffly.

 

“All three of us do,” Janis says. “We need to clear the air completely.”

 

Damian looks reluctant, but doesn’t disagree. His apology from Regina has been a long time coming.

 

* * *

 

By the end of the night, several things have happened: Damian and Regina talked it out so Damian could further understand Janis’s perspective on being her friend; Damian subsequently made up with Janis; and Cady told the group she’s into girls, Janis in particular.

 

“How did Joshua handle it?” Janis asks as they walk back to her truck, hand-in-hand.

 

“He was cool with it,” Cady answers, to Janis’s relief. She was prepared to kick his scrawny ass if he wasn’t respectful. “He said he wants to still be friends, though.”

 

Janis feels a rush of protectiveness. “Okay. Well, if he ever makes a move on you, let me know. Regina will help me hide the body.”

 

Cady laughs out loud, falling into Janis and hugging her waist. Janis could cry.

 

Janis drives Cady home, and the entire drive Cady is nearly in her lap again, head on Janis’s shoulder with their legs overlapping. Janis’s hand ends up sneaking under her skirt to touch her thigh, light but possessive. Cady grins like a dope.

 

She’s unwilling to exit the truck when Janis pulls up to her house. She sighs and Janis kisses the top of her head.

 

“I don’t wanna go,” she mumbles, snuggling closer to Janis.

 

“You can come over tomorrow,” Janis murmurs, putting her arm around her. “We can…hang out.”

 

Cady snickers, tilting her head back to press a kiss to Janis’s jaw. “And stuff,” she adds.

 

Janis bumps her nose against Cady’s, then kisses her, hand on her neck. “And stuff,” she agrees, biting Cady’s lip.

 

They kiss for a while longer, until they’re dizzy and their lips are red. But it’s getting late and Cady needs to go inside before her parents find them.

 

Cady gives Janis a sweet parting kiss, and whispers, “I love you.”

 

Janis has heard it before, but it sounds different now. “I love you, too.”

 

They smile at each other, then Cady pushes open the door and hops out of the truck. Janis leans on the steering wheel, watching Cady walk to the door. Cady turns to wave at her and Janis smiles, more in love in this moment than she ever has been.

 

When Janis arrives home, her dad is waiting for her, and he comes to greet her at the door. “Wow, you look beautiful,” he tells her. “Did you have fun?”

 

Janis nods, and does something she hasn’t done in a very long time. She goes to her father and embraces him, knowing he deserves it. He hugs her back enthusiastically, and Janis’s heart throbs with guilt. She tells herself to hug him more often. They might not have a lot in common, but hugs are always appreciated.

 

Janis kicks off her shoes and lies in bed for a while, looking through her photos from the night, smiling at all the ones of Cady. Her phone dings with a text right when she is going to take a shower, and she smiles when she sees it’s Cady.

 

 

Janis bites her knuckles to keep from squealing too loud. She promises Cady she will call her, and the buzz of excitement in her stomach keeps the smile on her face.

**Author's Note:**

> thank you guys so very much for your support for this little fic! i appreciate it so much. y’all are fetch.


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